Jolly feelings? Comfort and Joy? Merry and Bright? Harrumph.
So you and your ex just split up and you are getting accustomed to life as a single gal. Then add the stress and loneliness that the holiday season brings. This time of year is supposed to conjure warm, fuzzy feelings, but instead leaves you rethinking your decision to call it quits.
With a recent breakup in the mix, the holiday blues take on a completely different hue. It’s a little green of envy of those happy couples walking the bustling streets, a dash of red from anger and resentment at your ex and a dumping of black, representing your overall mood.
The absence of your former love is glaringly obvious during the hustle of social activity when we are all supposed to be feeling joyous, but that is no reason to bring that ex back in. That relationship was broken and you made the well-thought out decision to end it. Yet, the seasonal hype has sunk in its teeth, leading you to reconsider reconciliation for the wrong reasons.
Sure, it would be comforting to have someone by your side, but being alone under the mistletoe isn’t the worst thing that could happen. You could be back with that loser ex! Stay positive, stay busy and try some tips to add to that half-full bowl of jelly:
Throw a Seasonal Shin-dig
Call up your friends and have a holiday party. Try a potluck so you are not overwhelming yourself with preparation time and cost. Or, take this opportunity to try that whacky Tofurkey or Turducken recipe for your meat-less or meat loving pals for the first time. An evening with your buddies is always a great mood lifter that reminds you to be thankful for what you already have.
Volunteer
A failed love life is small potatoes compared to families falling on hard times of much greater proportion. To fight any lonely feelings, offer your help at the local shelter, food bank or senior’s facility for some holiday cheer. Charities can always use some another set of hands and philanthropy feeds the soul. Try spearheading an office food drive or get the girls together to sponsor a local family in need.
RSVP Yes
Maybe you aren’t in a rush to put on panty hose or bust out the red lipstick for a party, especially if you are not feeling at your best. But, try to accept an invitation or two for a holiday meal, a friend’s family dinner or your office party. A busy dance card will serve as a welcome diversion from pining over last year’s news.
Make Resolutions
Now is the time to throw yourself into those shelved, well-intended resolutions. Prioritize becoming more active, learning the piano or redecorating your bedroom. Enroll in an art program to try your hand at painting, join a sewing class to make those throw pillows you have been coveting or drag out those tools to make a bookshelf for that barren corner. Completing a project or jumping headfirst into a new lifestyle will keep you busy and provide a sense of accomplishment that is certain to feed the ego.
So, maybe spending the holidays alone is not what you pictured. Your plans of holiday coupledom are dashed, and it is okay to feel disappointed. But you are better off by making this difficult decision to end it and keep it that way, regardless of the time of year. Although you may not be feeling the joy to the world, you can make the season just a little more bright even while remaining single.
