Ask John: Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie & Nothing Up Top

By John Siscel May 22, 2012 10:07 AM
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Ask John: Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie & Nothing Up Top

Dear John,
It’s bikini season. I’m freaking out, because I don’t know what to wear. I’m not a Maxim Model. But I want to go to the beach and look good while I’m there. What do I do?

- What to wear

Dear WTW,
Everyone’s got something to work with. Figure out what you’ve got to work with (assuming you don’t already know) and build around it, then hide what you feel you need to. There are plenty of swimwear shops out there or sections in others stores staffed by women who can give you the assistance you need in figuring what to rock the beach with. And even though I hear bathing suit shopping is one of the most painful experiences for you girls, take a friend with and get a second opinion for if and when that body dismorphia sets in. Someone you trust and who loves you can tell you how hot you look in the right swimsuit.

Dear John,
My girlfriends and I are going to Vegas. They want to hit up one of those “naked” pools. Well, maybe they aren’t naked, but they’re at least topless, 21+, etc. My girlfriends are all about going to this place. I’m a little less than excited. I’m all for going wild and crazy in Vegas, but topless? Hmm…not so much. What should I do?
- Top off

Dear TO,
They aren’t going to allow cameras at the pool, so it’s safer to get naked or nearly naked there than say a public nude beach where there are tons of people and there isn’t any security making sure no one takes pictures that may wind up on the internet. So in that respect, if you’re going to get naked somewhere, this is probably the kind of place to do it.

Then again, a lot of these places can turn out to be sausage fests. Everyone pays to get in, and guys usually pay more than women, so that helps keep out some of the riff raff, but not all of it. There may be creepy guys there (as in single guys) who are there to get a peek.

That’s a bit trickier to do something about. If you go on a peak time (holidays or weekends), there will probably be some or maybe a lot of these types there .If you go, you might want to consider going during the week, when you will have less looky loos. If you go at 11 AM on a Tuesday you and your girls (both sets of them) may have the whole place to yourselves.

At the end of the day though, be comfortable with your decision. Peer pressure is no reason to let go of boundaries. Let them go topless and keep your top on if that’s the kind of girl you are. No shame in that.

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